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Showing posts with the label A. Prologue: My Other (Chapter 1)

What Happens When the Fat Lady Sings: Prologue--"My Other" (Chapter 1)

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My Other I first became aware of my fat when I was two. Yes, I think that awareness came first, that moment when a blob of fat jiggled into memory, unblocking Jungian canals of prehistory. It was only after fat-consciousness that I became aware of me as an entity in and of itself. In an instant, I went from nothingness to a wiggling amoeba to a suddenly complete human being sitting on a horse on a merry-go-round. My breath caught me by surprise, almost as if someone had jumped from behind and frightened me into existence. Now, what? Colors, sounds, smells, touch, and taste flooding my body. Feelings– wild and random and terrifying, like a sea of voices screaming in tongues, pushing me under. I can’t breathe! Then, something–someone?–moving through the canals of my brain– organizing, filing, and deleting. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....AIR! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh...! I wasn’t feeling dizzy as the merry-go-round spun around and my horse pumped up and down, like a wave ebbing and flowing and ebbing and f

Memoir Madness: Driven to Involuntary Commitment