Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday.Are you worried about tomorrow?--Author Unknown
If so, stop it!
Say to yourself:
Take care of today...today; worry about tomorrow...tomorrow.Obviously, we must plan for the future, but if we worry unduly about it, then we are wasting a lot of time and energy on what could end up being irrelevant.
Will I stick to my healthy plan tomorrow? I hope to, but I'd rather concentrate on today because today is NOW, and I have some control over NOW. Tomorrow is not yet accessible to me, and the past is over and done.
At my Weight Watchers meeting on Monday, "Red," another member, said that she came to WW to lose just 5 pounds. Just 5 pounds.
So far, she has lost "just 5 pounds" several times.
Red says that if she thinks too far ahead, the worry overwhelms her, and she gives up, so she sets small goals and celebrates when she meets them.
Red has it right--what with her wit and humor and positive outlook on life, she's going to lose her next 5 pounds, and then the next 5 pounds, and so on.
I'm a bit of a worrier, so this post is for me as well--a worrywart offering advice to other worrywarts. Isn't that rich?
I not only worry, but I'm also always in a hurry, wanting results NOW, a magic wand that could wipe away my remaining 35 pounds. Of course, that's not going to happen, so I'm taking a page from Red's book and setting small goals.
Besides, what's my hurry?
On September 11, 2010, I was slammed with a scary wake-up call (after pigging out at Old Country Buffet the night before), so I had a question and answer session with myself:
Q. So you're going on another diet?A good place to end for today.
A. (Sheepishly) Yeah. I gotta do something. I was up all night with acid indigestion and reflux. I thought I was going to die. Getting up and walking around didn't help. Even the 4 Mylanta tablets didn't help. Nothing but the passing of time helped. I don't like what I see in the mirror: I'm WAAAY overweight, and now it's affecting my well-being.
Q. So you're going on the same old diet and expecting a different result?
A. (Shrug) What else can I do? If I don't do something soon, even if it's wrong, I'll end up killing myself with my fork.
Q. So why not find a plan that will work for a lifetime?
A. I need to lose weight QUICK!!!
A. Well, because.
Q. (Buzzer). Not a good answer. What can you accomplish with a quick weight loss that you can't with a "Steady-as-she-goes" plan, a plan that will feed your body and soul right for the rest of your life?
A. I'll be healthier faster?
Q. Do you REALLY think that you can achieve good health by a quick-fix, deprivation diet?
Q. Okay, then, you're getting somewhere now. Do you understand now what you need to do?
A. Yes, develop a plan that fits my needs now and is sustainable for the rest of my life.
Q. What else?
A. I don't understand...
Q. What do you need to do for yourself RIGHT NOW?
A. Stop beating myself up?
Q. That's a question and not an answer.
A. And that's an answer, not a question. How can I stop beating myself up?
Q. The answer is within you. How can you find it?
A. (Thinking, thinking, thinking...) Okay, I need to start where I am RIGHT NOW.
Q. And where is that?
A. Probably at the lowest point in my life.
Q. Well, maybe from a physical standpoint.
But hasn't the past year been one of the most incredible times of your life? What about the Fulbright? Don't you have a lot to celebrate?
A. (Pause) I do.
Q. Were you awarded the Fulbright on the basis of your looks and weight?
A. Of course not.
Q. So how can you say that you are at the lowest point of your life?
A. Good point. So I'm starting right here, as a Fulbright Alum, a wife, a mother, a grandmother, and a writer. Physically, I feel lousy, but I do have a lot to be thankful for.
Q. Now we're getting somewhere. So where do you start TODAY?
A. Well, for today, overeating won't be a problem. I don't even want to look at food. What was I thinking last night?
Q. I'll ask the questions; you work on finding the answers within yourself. So where do you start?
A. I work up a sustainable plan that includes my favorite foods and does not kick in my insulin resistance. It will be trial and error, I think.
Q. What else?
A. Forgive myself?
Q. That's a question. Could you explain what self-forgiveness involves?
A. Forgive myself NOW for allowing myself to gain so much weight.
A. Build forgiveness into my plan, whatever it turns out to be. If history is any indication, I will blow my diet along the way...
Q. So what's the worst that can happen if you go off plan?
A. I'll gain weight and give up.
Q. So what if I told you that you can blow your plan AND still get back on it?
A. (A LOOOONNNNNGGGG pause)
A. My history doesn't support that model.
Q. History is so yesterday, not today.
Q. So what now?
A. Concentrate on today and not worry so much about tomorrow?
Q. Is that your final answer?
Q. Now get to work on that plan. Expect a lot of trial and error. Allow yourself to open up your mind and consider possibilities that may go against conventional wisdom.
A. No deprivation. I should be able to eat anything I want, but within reason.
A. Eat what I like, but eat smaller portions.
Q. What must you ALWAYS keep in mind?
A. I'm not perfect!
Q. What else?
A. Not to punish myself when I haven't acted perfectly, to pick myself off the ground, to move forward, and to love and nurture myself.
Q. You have your answer now. Go forth, and figure out your new life plan.
Tomorrow, I'll talk about number obsession.
Ta, Ta, CF.